For new teachers, leading productive and informative parent-teacher conferences while staying on schedule can be a Herculean effort. Here are a few tips to make the most of upcoming conferences.

Lead with the positive. Consider each conference as having three brief “acts,” and Act 1 is communicating something positive about the child. “Lead with the good, then go to the growth areas,” says Johanna Josaphat, a middle school language-acquisition specialist at the Urban Assembly Unison School in Brooklyn. If students are included in the conference, ask them to share a work sample or describe an assignment that showcases their hard work.

Consider the language you use to address tough topics. Act 2 of the parent-teacher conference is identifying what the child needs to work on — their goals — and presenting the plan for doing so.

Helena Johnson, who teaches 4th grade at PS 44 in Brooklyn, emphasizes that teachers should frame their critiques positively and come prepared with the learning standards, grading criteria and recent assessments. Talk about areas for growth, not deficits. For example, instead of saying, “Kaitlyn is not at grade level for writing,” you could say, “Kaitlyn is working on adding descriptive details to her narrative writing” and show the learning standard. For behavior issues, describe the area for growth, such as “Michael is working on staying focused during small-group work.”

Segue from a discussion of growth areas to a plan. Talk about the child’s goals and how you’ll be moving them toward those goals. After identifying how a student is struggling with rounding numbers, for instance, Johnson transitions immediately into the plan for helping the student improve. “Don’t make the parent feel like ‘Oh God, my child is not succeeding,’” she says.

If necessary, schedule a follow-up meeting to discuss progress. Parents should leave conferences feeling optimistic that you are alert to their child’s learning needs and will move them toward their goals.

Be sensitive about exemplars. Some teachers like to show samples of grade-level or above-grade-level work for specific assignments with the names redacted. But for a student with significant learning challenges, this can be painful for the child and their parents. “It’s hard to say to the parent, ‘This is what 6th-grade work looks like, and this is where your child should be,’” when that goal isn’t realistic in the short term, says Josaphat. “Talk about the child that’s in front of you." For a child with disabilities, she says, "Speak in the language of the child’s IEP goals — which are different for every child.” Likewise, she stresses that you shouldn't say to a newcomer student and their parents, “This is what other 6th-graders are doing” while the child is still assimilating and learning English.

Ask questions. Act 3 is just listening. Johnson always reserves a few minutes to ask how she can help the parent. “Some parents won't understand the work themselves,” she says, and will need further explanations. Some families have complicated or difficult home lives, and you’ll be able to gather valuable information by allowing parents a little time to talk. “Just be a listener,” says Johnson, “and from there you will understand better how to proceed with their children.” Parent-teacher conferences are an opportunity to build a relationship with the whole family — which can only benefit your work with the student.